{"id":1013,"date":"2017-05-30T07:27:25","date_gmt":"2017-05-30T11:27:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/?p=1013"},"modified":"2019-09-07T02:08:14","modified_gmt":"2019-09-07T02:08:14","slug":"growing-old-together","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/growing-old-together\/","title":{"rendered":"Growing old, together"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/p>\n

An alluring spring dawn had announced itself through the slats in the window blinds long before we raised our heads from the pillows simultaneously and locked eyes.\u00a0 No words were exchanged, but the message was clear.\u00a0 Keats would have observed us as two souls with but a single thought:\u00a0 It was too early to get up.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not sure which of us dropped our head back to the pillow first.\u00a0 It might have been the dog, it might have been me.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t wait to see if she would close her eyes again, because I knew that if I did, she would follow suit.\u00a0 Whenever possible, we prefer to linger prone on the soft surfaces\u2014separate ones, mind you, we don\u2019t share–in the early hours.\u00a0 We are not morning people.<\/p>\n

We have been together a decade now, Madeline Basset* and I, that span representing the longest relationship I\u2019ve sustained with someone who lives here, other than the time I raised my daughter.\u00a0 Our relationship has mellowed, as all enduring ones do, into a tapestry of shared joys balanced with loving tolerance and the occasional negotiated outright frustration.\u00a0 This many years in, I expend much less energy resolving the latter, often giving in in ways uncharacteristic of my general policy.\u00a0 Blatant misbehavior cannot be allowed, of course, but so many things are right on the edge, and after all, is compromise not the road to world peace? And like all good partnerships, there are ways in which we work just alike, and ways in which we balance each other out as opposites.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We love socializing, most of all with family but also with neighbors and friends, but we do not suffer lightly fools who misbehave, especially right in our faces.\u00a0 At such times, we have been known to bark in disapproval.\u00a0 We frequently disregard those who tell us what to do, even though we may appear to capitulate in the short term.\u00a0 We appreciate recognition, but are content not to be the center of attention.\u00a0 We love groups but also need our quiet time.\u00a0 We don\u2019t like thunderstorms.\u00a0 Ever.\"\"<\/p>\n

And yet the opposites reinforce the twosome.\u00a0 Overdrive is my default mode, unfortunately, while supreme relaxation and Zen-like repose are hers.\u00a0 A basset might be nature\u2019s antidote for the restless and overwrought.\u00a0 Her exceptional talent in this regard once drew the loving sarcasm of my late father, who loved animals in his own way.\u00a0 Observing her curled up and snoring soundly on a corner of the couch during a loud family party, the house full of people, he whispered in my ear: \u201cI\u2019m worried about Madeline.\u201d\u00a0 Oh, no!\u00a0 I said, failing to notice the glint in his eye.\u00a0 What\u2019s wrong?\u00a0 \u201cShe\u2019s exhibiting signs of a stress disorder,\u201d he cracked.<\/p>\n

Much has been written about the bond between humans \"\"and the canines who join their lives to ours.\u00a0 I don\u2019t pretend to understand the biology of it, but never doubt the intriguing facts that come along now and then.\u00a0 I once mentioned to a friend that that Madeline clearly knows who is at the door before they enter\u2014the unidentifiable outsider gaining the deep guard-dog bark, the cherished friends and family naught but a wag of the tail and lick on the ankles. \u00a0She had read they can hear human heartbeats, and perhaps that is an identifier?<\/p>\n

\"\"Hounds, of course, possess discernment of scent that is far beyond human comprehension.\u00a0 Taking a walk requires one of those compromises I mentioned earlier; the nose drives all perceptions and actions, and some olfactory evidence, most of it at ground level, must be lingered over and\u00a0 studied. It seemed prudent to cease opposing this necessity long ago, so I christened our slow but steady forward progress The Hound Dog Shuffle.\u00a0 Often other dog owners walking the boundaries of our neighborhood will lap us, the quick ones more than once.\u00a0 The occasional passer-by, in the company of a canine of average height and a nose that is pointed forward instead of down, will observe this pattern with a smile and ask, \u201cWhat is she doing?\u201d\u00a0 My response:\u00a0 reading the day\u2019s news.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Kind friends laugh away my acknowledgments of the old saw, that joke that we are naturally drawn to dogs that look like us.\u00a0 They might be too indulging to openly admit that a funny-looking dog with red hair, freckles, and remarkably short legs resemble any pal of theirs.\u00a0 Of the fact that I was nicknamed Stump by a rough-edged boss at my college part-time job, I say very little.<\/p>\n

Looks aside, there can be no question that females who have achieved middle age and beyond soldier other challenges in common.\u00a0 We have bad knees, and don\u2019t care much for steps anymore.\u00a0 Our ears require constant maintenance, hers for obvious reasons, mine to navigate my marked, inherited hearing impairment.\u00a0 Our bladders demand relief way more often than is convenient.\u00a0 The number of pill bottles in the cupboard is increasing.\"\"<\/p>\n

Who knows what dogs understand about their lot in life?\u00a0 Probably more than we imagine.\u00a0 I hope she never wonders, as I so often do, how much more time we\u2019ll have together.\u00a0 As the months roll inexorably on, we cope, we adjust, we change, we accommodate, staying close to the things we love most, managing everything else the best we can.\u00a0 I guess that\u2019s what growing older is all about.\u00a0 We\u2019re walking that path side-by-side, making it a little easier for each other as we go.<\/p>\n

—————————————————————————————————————————————-\"\"<\/p>\n

++I am often asked why I named a basset Madeline.\u00a0 She is the namesake of a young female character in the stories of legendary British humorist P.G. Wodehouse.\u00a0 The Madeline Bassett of Wodehouse fame was a soft-spoken, romance-babbling airhead who frightened practical-thinking men and was always getting entangled in the wrong relationship.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

An alluring spring dawn had announced itself through the slats in the window blinds long before we raised our heads from the pillows simultaneously and locked eyes.\u00a0 No words were exchanged, but the message was clear.\u00a0 Keats would have observed us as two souls with but a single thought:\u00a0 It was too early to get […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1719,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1013","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","category-mid-life-adventures"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1013","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1013"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1013\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1719"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1013"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1013"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gmachronicles.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1013"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}